It’s such a weird feeling. When you know something’s wrong but you can’t quite put your finger on it.
It took finally breathing again to realize I had been choking this whole time.
I’ve always known something was wrong. I’ve never felt content with how I lived my life. Visiting Germany made me start to look at how I live and really ask myself is this the life I want for myself.
I know moving abroad isn’t going to magically solve my problems. For me, it just took a really long time to realize that my way of life wasn’t the only way. When things don’t make you happy you don’t have to do them. I feel like, in America, it’s so easy to get caught up in the rush of life. We drown ourselves in our jobs because if you’re not working harder than everyone else- you’re not living the American Dream. We want easy, convenient, and fast and we live for the instant gratification of a culture that worships consumerism. Living like this has just never satisfied me. I want to slow down and find the things that do matter to me.
Life isn’t a race and it shouldn’t feel like this.
And maybe I’ll go to Germany and there’ll be things there that annoy me way more than the problems I feel in America ever did. Well, that’s life and I guess that’s just another step in discovering what I really want from my life. Because I want to feel at home in my lifestyle. I don’t want to feel like I have to do something because it’s expected of me.
I want to take a step away from a life that’s been suffocating me and finally breathe